Wednesday, February 03, 2010

The Life of a Techie

Caller- I'm having problems connecting with my vpn. I was connected but now I'm not.
Me- Ok, what's the error you're getting?
Caller- Shoot, I don't remember but it's after it starts trying to connect... hold on I'll try to find it again.
Me- Is it secure connection lost, remote host not responding...?
Caller- Remote host! That's it.
Me- Do you have a firewall on?
Caller- No, I just rebooted there's no firewall.
Me- If you just rebooted the firewall probably re-enabled.
Caller- Really? Oh... how do I find it... wait yes there it is!
Me- Ok go ahead and disable that.
Caller- Ok now what?
Me- Try and connect again.
Caller- It says unable to find the ip, switching to back-up...
Me- Can you get to google for me?
Caller- No I don't have any kind of connection, I lost all of it.
Me- You kind of need internet for VPN to work.
Caller- Really?
Me- Really. *pounds face against keyboard*

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Metal Concerts Dos and Don'ts

It's been quite a long time since I've posted on my own blog. While guest editing for I realized I've sort of missed the egocentricity. So here's my gallant return, and the topic- Metal concerts. So without any further ado, enjoy.

Dos- Metal is a genre of variety with a core sound that speaks to fans across the differing styles. From death metal to symphonic metal, the thrashing rhythms, growling male vocals, and pounding drums make us feel alive. So of course there are some core things that you must do. I like cohesive lists so here are the top five:

1. Dress appropriately- while everyone enjoys a gothed out look from time to time, this is a Metal concert, which includes mosh pits. This means it's going to get hot, and more than possibly violent. So wearing appropriate clothing and footwear is a must.

2. Look into the line-up. If you're there to see a headline-ing band, check to see who the openers are, give yourself a point of reference on what kind of sound they have so if you like them live you can add them to your list of bands to check out.

3. Bring ear plugs. I know, that's not hardcore, but it's not cool to be deaf at the age of 40 either. You can still hear the music, you can still feel the pulse of the rhythm and you're protecting your hearing for the music you'll be listening to forty years from now. Plus, if you really hate one of the opening acts maybe it'll help tune them out more. Probably not, but maybe.

4. Bring friends. This seems rather obvious, but it can't be overstated. Metal is a growing genre of mostly recommendation. Most of the best bands out there aren't being played on radios and word of mouth is what gets the music we love out there. Do you have friends that are into some of the more main-streamed metal? Do you have a closet metal friend? Bring them! Open up the world of metal to more people!

5. Have fun, but do it safely. Revelry is to be expected, encouraged, embraced, and demon horned. But don't be stupid. We get a bad rep as it is showing up with our tattoos, piercings, metallic accessories, and black. Be safe when you're partying.

Pretty common sense Dos right? You'd think the Don'ts would be as well. But, after attending the Epica concert last night, I think some of us might need reminders.

1. Air guitar is for youtube and the privacy of your bedroom. Nothing makes you look like a punk more than rocking out on the emperor's axe. I think the only thing more stupid is that random older guy playing air keyboard. Come on now, really?

2. If you're there because your boyfriend is into Metal and you want to be the cool supportive girlfriend, great! BUT, dancing like you're at a Brittany Spears concert, holding your hair back like you're in your own center stage just makes you a tool. Maybe that's judgemental on my part, but do you see the head banging? And you're there gettin' jiggy wit it... not metal babe.

3. Mosh pits are NOT, I'll repeat this, are NOT where you try and practice tai chi. That girl in point number 2 that looks like a tool is the hottest piece on the dance floor when compared to your tucked in t-shirt, high-riding tight jeans wearing Mr Miagi wannabe punk self.

4. Don't cause permanent damage. Whether it's to yourself, the venue, and/or others around you, causing permanent or expensive harm is just stupid. Yes, moshing is freaking awesome, no having whiplash is not cool.

5. I think it's great that the younger crowds want to go to Metal shows. Bring the family, rock on! But when aren't allowed to leave the pit because you're underage and don't have the right mark, band, ribbon, magic word, be a big kid, suck it up, and don't bitch because the rules don't suit you. This is a metal show, not the emo show, SHUT IT.

So those are some very strong guidelines I'd personally like to pass on. If the Design Your Universe tour is coming near you, I strongly recommend attending. It's completely worth it.